Coming Out Story (UPDATED)

Name : Kira Herdman

Yes this is my legal name, I changed it via Deedpoll and I am Transgender.

I knew I was different when I was 5. There was 2 problems, Section 28 and religious family. I didn’t even know what Transgender or even LGBT was until I was 20.

I have always thought I was Bi and I had my first experience with a man at the age of 20 when I was in the Army, based in Tidworth, Wiltshire. No one knew as I was straight acting and more attracted to women than men. It stayed this way until a few years ago.

The only person who knew I was Bi was my sister. I told her about 8 years ago that I was. About 3 years ago my niece came out as lesbian (but now is Bi) but was shy about it so I decided to come out publicly to support her. It seemed to help her. I was in a relationship at the time as well, though my then GF had problems with it.

During the pandemic I found out my ex was cheating on me so we split up. All this time, I have felt I was in the wrong body, never really took good care of myself, always liked pink, liked dolls over action figures etc. The only manly thing I really liked was computers.

I knew I was in the wrong body, hated the fact I can grow a beard, was going bald, hairy legs, flat chest, adam’s apple and other things.

I was unhappy in myself. When I split up from my ex I thought, my life is going no where, I need to sort this out.

So I came out as Transgender, at first I told my sister and niece, they are both supportive of it. Then my cousin’s other half also told he she is Bi, which I would have never guessed. This was March 2 years ago. My cousins other half as since come out as Agender/non binary.

In the last 2 years since coming out as Transgender, I have never been happier than I am in myself today. Least year I finally got rid of all my “Man” clothes that I had left. I dress as a woman, because I know I am a woman inside my head.

Yes I have Gender Dysphoria, yes I have found it hard and suffered alone as I was ashamed of it. But one Neighbor has been very supportive. I know she will read this, all I can say is thank you. You may not realize this but I am alive thanks to you. This is how bad Gender Dysphoria can get.

Since coming out as Transgender I have noticed I take a lot more pride in my appearance, I take a lot better care in myself. For instance I never used to use creams, now I feel dirty if I have not put any on in the morning, even after a bath. I never used deodorants (well I hardly used any) now I hate not smelling nice. I take more pride in my home as well, keep it more clean than I used to. In other words, I have finally become alive, not just living.

Also I have come to realize I am exclusively attracted to women, tho I do find some men are very sexy, I don't have an attraction to them. It has taken me a long time to realize that I am a lesbian. I wont shut the door on men all together but so far only 1 I have had any attraction to and hes just a good mate. I think it was an attraction that was more motherly than anything else. Sorry Conner lol.

My home town had its first Pride event this year. This was one of the best days of my life and made me realize we are not alone, we, the LGBT+ community are a family that can support each other.

Yes I still have problems, I have PTSD after all from my time in the Army, but even that is easier at times, even though I still go quiet a lot (sorry).

I am proud I also work as a community news reader for Trans Radio UK and a member of the Labour Party, fighting for LGBT+ Rights but especially Trans Rights. I also volunteer for a local LGBT+ group in my home town.

This is my coming out story. This is how I, Kira, now lives her true self and finally can stop pretending to be someone I am not.